I believe in 'one thing at a time'. That's always been my philosophy. Probably because that's what people have always told me....whenever I would start getting ahead of myself, that's what they would say. "One thing at a time, Katy." And I listened.
But what happens when life doesn't follow the same game plan? When it doesn't come at you one thing at a time, but rather it hurls as many things as it possibly can at you all at the same time? It's like you're standing there with a tennis racket in your hand, trying desperately to hit the ball as it's served to you by one of those power machines that throws them out in rapid succession. Sure, you can hit one or two here and there...but what about the others? They just go flying by.
You've only got one racket.
So much for one thing at a time.
So many questions running through my mind, so many decisions that have to be made, and made yesterday. But really, the decisions I can handle. I can do those one at a time.
But what about the things that I have absolutely no control over?... Some would say don't worry about them if there's nothing I can do.
Oh, if life were so simple.
I may not have control over some things in my life, but they're still things that affect every single day of my life, things that I'm trying to influence and find answers for every night when I can't sleep. And I still come up empty-handed. But I can't just sit back. These are perhaps the most important questions in my life. How do I leave those alone?
And again, they're all right here, right now, bombarding me, trying to coerce answers and hopes and questions and theories and decisions from me. I don't know how to follow the 'one thing at a time' mantra anymore. I don't know if it works after all or not.
I need a magic lamp or crystal ball or a time machine. Or something. Something....
